Becoming a carer

Judith has written to tell us of her roller coaster ride into carerhood!

"I am a carer!  I didn't ask to be one and I certainly didn't want to be one, but here I am.  My journey started back in 2007....

 My husband, David and I were truly the luckiest people on the planet when we were introduced to the most gorgeous and amazing 7 month old little boy who was to become our son, through adoption.  Our life was complete.  Our life as a family could begin. 

 I guess looking back at those early months there were signs that all was not well.  We raised our concerns with health professionals who always assured  us our son's development and behaviour was age appropriate.  Being first time parents, with little experience, we didn't want to appear neurotic and accepted their reassurance, however the doubts lingered on.

 As soon as our son was able to walk our life turned upside down and as he grew older the difficulties increased.  Aggression, oppositional and inappropriate behaviour, meltdowns, hyperactivity, impulsiveness, toileting, sensory, social and emotional difficulties. the list goes on.  At one point we were even asked to remove him permanently from a day care nursery as the staff couldn't cope with his behaviour.  He was only 18 months old.

 Earlier this year, just 2 weeks before his 4th birthday our son was diagnosed with ADHD and we are now beginning an Autistic Spectrum Disorder  assessment process. 

 I can't begin to describe the emotional rollercoaster we have all been on. Personally, I am never far from an emotional breakdown.  I have been so physically and mentally exhausted that I often wondered if I had the

 strength to keep going. 

  

 I'm sure many, if not most, carers have felt as I have and often still feel. There are however, things that keep myself and my husband from 'going under' - the support of family, friends and work colleagues; the help my son receives from the professionals involved in his care and education and finally the support, information and encouragement we get from organisations like Fife Action on Autism, PHAD Fife and the Carers Centre. 

 I am not the strong, capable person that I was, but I am getting there.  We still believe we are the luckiest people on the planet.  Our son is still the most gorgeous and amazing little boy ever.  We love him, we are proud of him and, as a family we are starting to embrace life once more."